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Posts Tagged ‘Social Networking’


“Only mediocrity is safe. Get ready to be attacked, and be the best.” Paulo Coehlo

When this blog started in 2008 (you know, when Twitter was still fun and Facebook was still cool), the online world was a playground of possibilities.

Connections were made, real friendships were started, opportunities came and went.

Relationships started and relationships fizzled.

Of those fizzled relationships, some just gradually disappeared amicably and some ended nastily.

Yet many relationships endured and got even deeper. I could not even begin to list how many people I have met online (and then in real life) who are as much a part of my life now than my fanatical love of bad sports teams from Boston.

Fast forward to 2012.

Social media has gone “mainstream” and everyone is offering advice and opinions. Brands are paying attention (which is both bad and good). Now everyone has the way to “succeed” in social media, to share the WAY that will work for you. But the fact is simple: there is no RIGHT WAY, there is no ONE WAY, there is no WINNING FORMULA to succeed, no matter what you use social media for.

The ONLY TRUE WAY to find that success is this: never, never, never stop being yourself. Never ever lose your passion of why you do what you do in the first place. Be real, be true, be helpful, be giving, be authentic, and be transparent.

Which leads me to the point of this blog: don’t ever give up. For example, if the world is questioning the fact that you are just a “crab in a bucket,” go build your own bucket and find like-minded crabs. Walk away from the negative energy and move on. Use that block feature on Twitter and Facebook, it’s ok, we all use it. Stop worrying about what others say about you and just focus on what you can control. By being who you truly are, others who see you true essence will begin to show up. And they will stay. Those who don’t will never care, so why waste your time trying to win them over?

We are at a momentous moment in the world’s history, where 140 characters or one photo can impact change. The old business guard is freaking out because the one-way world (me have product/me market product/you buy product) is over. Now the business model is two-way (me have product, so?, me want you to buy product/no, because your product sucks, I am going to make my own product/ok, how can I help?). Everyone and everything, from the big Fortune 500 company to the blogger in some corner of the world, are on the same playing field.

That is the crossroads where we are at right now. There will be those who see social media as a logical extension of how business has been done for centuries. They are the mainstream, the safe ones, the ones who will tell you, “Hey, don’t rock the boat because if you do, you will bring others down with you. You’ll be a crab in a bucket.” Then there are those who see social media as the NEW WAY, and it will crush the OLD WAY eventually. Those who thought safely will wonder what happened. Those who didn’t, who created their own buckets and invited their favorite crabs, will be leading the charge in the paradigm shift.

My dear friend, Sarah Robinson (she of the original posse), wrote a piece last year that has resonated with me the last few months. Called, “Crabs in Bucket,” Sarah tells of the time she tweeted Paolo Coehlo after the great writer tweeted the quote at the top of this post. Let her words explain:

Fast forward to this morning. As I was drinking my coffee and perusing my twitter stream, and up pops this gem from @paulocoelho (He wrote The Alchemist, one of my all time favorite books): “Only mediocrity is safe. Get ready to be attacked, and be the best.”

Maybe it was the early hour. Maybe it was my post-event mushy brain. I don’t know. But the minute I read Paulo’s tweet, I thought of those crabs in a bucket. So I sent him this tweet: “I’m thinking of crabs in a bucket. They always try to pull down the one who’s figured out how to escape.”

So now I’m thinking about the Escaping Mediocrity journey with this lens. There will always be people who will subtly or not so subtly try to keep us from escaping. Why? Because our escape threatens their mediocre existence. Pulling us down, sabotaging our efforts, picking apart our brilliant ideas – all of that keeps them feeling safe. And living undisturbed mediocre lives.

So what if we added a new piece to the crab mentality picture? Imagine a crab, or a group of crabs on the other side of the bucket building a ladder to aid your escape. They managed to crawl out of the bucket in spite of all the energetic attempts to pull them backwards. Because they’ve tasted freedom and they know your struggle, they are putting energy into aiding and abetting your escape.

I believe that for those of us determined to get out of the bucket, such a group exists. It may take some time to find them, but they are there, ready throw a safety rope over the edge and pull us out.

Start listening for them. Start looking for them. They are there. Reach just a little further and they’ll meet you at the edge of the bucket.

Escape the big bucket now. Go get your own bucket and fill it with the coolest crabs you know. Together, you can change the world.

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I love musicals. There, I said it. I love musicals. One of my favorite musicals is “West Side Story.” It’s a Puerto Rican thing. And one of my favorite songs from WSS is “Cool.” You know how it goes: “Boy, boy, crazy boy, Stay cool, boy, Breeze it, buzz it, Easy does it Stay cooly cool boy.” Feel free to hum it as you read this. (PS: I’ve linked it at the end of this blog, enjoy, but promise me to go to it AFTER you read this? Thanks!)

This topic is about “playing it cool” on the Internet. By that, I mean when someone sees what you are doing online and they say “Wow, that’s cool,” instead of “Really? Not cool at all. What were you thinking?”

So, are you ready to “play it cool?”

Cool Rule 1: Always tell the truth about yourself. Social networks are like giant swimming pools. You need to dive in and submerge yourself. Don’t just be on the edge with your toe in the water. Don’t play in the kiddie section. If you are serious about establishing a killer social presence, you have to be prepared to tell the truth about yourself. That is cool. People will know you are cool if you are honest.

Use tools like LinkedIn to establish your professional background. There is a great function on the site that allows you to create a PDF of your resume instantly. Very cool.

Cool Rule 2: Show your face. If not, show something about you. You have to have a profile picture, you have to have a profile picture. Did I mention that you have to have a profile picture? Another very cool thing.

Cool Rule 3: Stop talking all the time about your business opportunity. I get it. Really, I get it. Thanks for sharing for the 200th time. Play it cool. Here’s a novel concept: talk about yourself. What books are your reading? What movies do you like? Do you have a family? What is your favorite hobby? Believe me, NO ONE is going to sign up for your biz opp if you are jamming it down people’s throats. That is so uncool.

Cool Rule 4: Don’t hit Reply All ever. I know sometimes people make mistakes and tend to hit Reply All to a message I might be sending to all my Friends. Even though it is an honest mistake, it is still so uncool. This is what I call “Lazy Lead Building,” that is, you are using the list I have worked so hard to build and just spamming people with a new biz opp. Guess what? Your reputation goes down very quickly if you do this. A huge no-no.

Cool Rule 5: Be kind. Be abundant. Be positive. Be supporting. Be loving. I don’t warm up to negativity. Not many people do. If you are negative person that likes to just criticize everything, social networking might not be for you. I think it’s so cool when I receive incredible positive vibes from my friends. I tried very hard to send out my own vibes on a daily basis. What I receive back is awesome.

So, remember: “Go cat, go, but not like a yo-yo schoolboy. Just play it cool, boy. Real cool.”

Now you can enjoy the song: Cool from West Side Story

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